B N Missions

How is it going, here in Pemba?

First off I am tring to remember what I have shared and have not. or What I have writen in emails so if I repeat myself pease pardon me. pardon- forgive. Desculpa- I am sorry in Portugese.
I don't feel like I mesh and my pacientce is short somedays. But I know I am being stretched, and God is trying to teach me through this. But There is a deffinate diffrence in me and my reaction to the culture and the people here compaired to other places I have been. Which is good and bad. Good- because I see how excited my heart gets in terms of Latin America / Europe (for them to come to know the Lord). Bad- in the sence that The Lord calls us to take care of all and care for His sheep. And in this case by sheep I mean the people of this earth He has created and wants to see them not decived and come to kow Him and His salvation. (Read it Ezeikle 34- I know it is talking about Isreal but God was using it to speak to me in the here and now). So when I am in the village I see the people with Love and am ready to move in and work with them. But the poeple and kids that come in from the village are not on their best behavior away form their parents etc. But I know that the problem is with me and things that God is scraping off of me or showing me things in me that need to change.

I have to keep in mind that this culture is so diffrent they don't have Judeo Chirstian belifes or ethics. They don't know the Ten Commandments. As Heidi was speaking she was explaining they have grown up with the mentality or philosphy of -- "A goat tied to a post can have as much grass as it reach." So if it is in the goats reach then they are gonna eat it. And that seems to be how things go here, things can easily disipear easily. There are many opportunist. If I can get my hands on it then i can have it. Which is so diffrent to what Westerners have engrained in them from the begining. We act out of a sence of indiviualisim and they opperate in a community. And there is not a great attacment to things here. Why would you be attched whenyou don't have much and if a "goat can grase" things are temporary. That is a good thing to not be attched to earthly things but also that leads to the diffrences of how we treat things. As Westerners we are taught most of the time to take care of things so they last. But as I see things here, things are temporary so the care is not put in to perserving things at the same level. These things may seem trivial but really are some of our foudnations of how we live life and relate. I feel like I am in a PHD prgram of anthropoloy or socialogy. Lots to process!!! This blog is slowly becoming a place to process and journal. I am don't know if that is good or not. It may get embarassing for me since I don't opperate with that many filters. Hopefully I will not stick my foot in my mouth. But please grant me grace and know that life is a process.

I am slowly making some mozambquie friends. You may seem shocked but - keep in mind I have class and some other things on the schedulal which eat up time. And there are people that I talk with and try and form relationships daily but it feels like there is an adgenda on both sides. They may want to get something from me, or are trying to marry me or I am trying to learn portugese. It is just forced. So I have been helping with the horses here and the guy that works with them speaks fairly good english, so we chat. It seems like we are becoming freinds, and I am excited. Frindship can't be forced ya know, But He seems chill/ cool. HIs name is Edu. He likes to ask me questions. Todays was, Do I have a specail freind? (boyfreind or husband). and I say, No. Then as most here, He will continue to say, Why? And I follow with, I don't know. Today He said, You need to ask God why. - It cracks me up, and frustraights me all in the same breath. But I geuss I share that to say I hope I can have a true mozambquiecan freind here. I would love to have more, so we shall see. But my language is fair I can get around and get thigns done but to have a indepth conversation is a whole other level of portugese. And my Macuwa- is pitifal, bu tthey crack up when a white person speaks their language. Wheather i say it right or not it is sofunny to them.

If this sounds like complaining. please don't take it that way I am just telling things going on here, life is full of things to ponder. But it is not complaining. I am just trying to share my experinces here. I am not great at making things sound fluffy and wonderful or sugar coating. But if you know me than you should know that about me.

The people here int eh school are passionate for the Lord and I am learning and being spurred on by their example. And just how they approch God diffrently. They dont' put Him in a box. Or at least we are being challenged to take HIm out of that box. So there are times I have had these theories or thoughts from the Lord or thoughts about the Lord that help me understand Him. And some of the speakers here have hit on these thoughts and theiories exact on the dot. It is so nice to have conformation in those things and encourages me to walk in those ideas in confidence in the future. To know others have had these ideas or God has spoken to them about the same thing. And to walk in freedom in the Lord. And to not let satan have his thumb on me or oppress me or tell me lies. Christ has already faught that battle. We woud be handing abck land that has already been faught for and won, And handing it to the enemy free of charge. (it rediculaous)
Or even to let my own heart condem me. And that that is not acceptabel either. I am learning that God speaks to me in many ways and I seem to brush it off as though I don't know what I am talking about. As thought - I couldn't have understanding on this asue who am I. When really I am saying my weekness or lacking is prohibity God form working. That is redicualous. My weekness is not opstical for Him. But really God is speaking to me. And He speaks to us in the ways He knows we will unerstand He translates it to our heart lanuage and that maybe is why it is hard for me to see if it is me or Him, cause He speaks so well to my heart that I can't recognize it as forgien. But those times I do recognze it as something foreigen I always give him credit. (condeming heart 1 John3:19-22) I hope that makes sence those are some things I am pondering on or realizing things I belive that I didn't realize, and some of them are lies. I thank the Lord that He doesn't give up on us. I am a slow mover sometimes.

Does that make sence. I just assumed having the mind of an artist that I was wierd but I always assumed I am wrong in my thoughts but in learning from speakers and conversations with people in the day to day, I am learing tons of how God is speaking to me I just didn't give him enough credit that He was that good at communication. But at the same time how ammazing is the Lord that He communicates on such a great level, adn intamae level.

I am learning of new speakers and musiians. I am excited about some of the music, it speaks the cries of the heart to God. You can look up and get some of it if you like. I am LOVE music so I have to pass along the good things I have found. You may have heard of some of them but since there is a range of people reading this I will put a mix, and we can all move on from Sandy patty, eh. -Watchmen for the nations. -Jason Upton -Enter the Worship Circle -100 portraits -Water Deep, -Healing Gate ministry, -Hillsong -Brian Johnson - Kelly Warren -Johnathan Helser -JoAnn Mc Fatter - IHOP worship team -Brenton Brown -Georgian Bannoff ?
sites you can check out of other music - Morning star ( a church n N.C) and IHOP- Internation House of Prayer some cool stuff.

So this school is in a diffrent arena of chirstianity. I guess you classify it as Charasmatic. And therefore i am learning new sides of God. Being that I was raised in the evagelical prodstant side that didn't really speak much about the Holy Spirit. I am enjoying learning, and seeing God in a new light and watching HIm opperate out of the box I put HIm in. He is a great God. Man !!!

I am going to an outreach tonight. Where we go to a village and show the Jesus film, and speak and evangelize. It should be cool. And this band is here visiting that is amazing. Their name is Georgian Bannoff. I don't know how to spell it. I think they are partly from Belgum. They rock, like let's have a hoe down,kinda rock. I can't stand still kinda music. They get the drums, fiddle, guitar jammin. you can't help but want to dance. it reminds me of home a bit. a bit of blugrass just cause of the fiddle.
So I finally picked up my cammera this week. after three weeks of not even taking it out. I get such enjoyment and I think God does too. Like someone is noticing the cool creations He has put all over the earth. That is what compells me, to capture the beauty of the world and show it to others. A good photograph captures a glimsp of the beauty He has made. Well I am still alive and kickin. I will leave you with a new verse I found
(song of soloman 8:14) my version says---Joyfully the radiant bride turned to him, the one altogether lovely, the chief among ten thousand to her soul, and with unconcealed eagerness to begin her life of sweet companionship with Him, she answered, Make haste my beloved....

I am just learning let's not yearn so much for the future or read the word of what will happen in the future to forget to live it today. God calls us today, the here and the now. Maybe that doen't apply to you but I am just learing I have learned so much of what is to happen in the future or endtimes that I forget to let God penitrate my heart now. SO I am enjoying all that He is saying in the here and now. The commpanionship of a Bride & Bridegroom. Chao Beloved....... BE LOVED